Puppy play time.

A little desperate

I just used a pumice stone to file my nails because I couldn't find my nail file. That's pretty desperate right? Oh wait, there was that time I broke my nail while waiting at my highschool bus stop and attempted to use the sidewalk. Hey, it did soften the edge a little.

So at any rate......

I drew you a picture. This is my family.... aren't we good looking?

Supposed

I am doing what I am supposed to be doing
I am doing what I am supposed
to be.

It's a little song that I made up in my head one day when I realized I am always thinking and often worrying about what I am going to do next or, what I should be doing now instead. So, I sing that little song to remind me to focus on now, enjoy now. Instead of worrying about the next moment and having a life time of worried rushed moments. Besides, who the hell knows what I am supposed to being doing?

I have to sing that song a lot it seems. Hmm, maybe I need a new song. But it has a really cool little piccolo solo that goes all whhhoooo whoo whooooooooowhowhowho wo woo ( it sounds less like a train in my head). I mainly choose piccolo because it sounds bohemian, and those bohemian people seem content. Also, piccolo is a fun word to say, try it.

My body is a DICK!

So every single time I plan a trip my body decides to get all sick. D and I are going to a hot air balloon fest this Saturday and now my face is all drainy and gross, my left eye is watering, my glands are swollen, my throat hurts from mouth breathing and I keep sneezing. Last trip we went on, same thing and the one before that and the one before that...you get the point. For the love.

Screw you body.. screw you! Next time I am going on a trip I'm not telling you.

Oh and you know how noses don't work so well when they are stuffed up? So I ate chicken garlic soup for lunch and had no idea how horrible my breath was until the end of the day when a pregnant co-worker almost vomited when I talked to her. Nice.

Like I said- my body... total Dick.

LATER THAT NIGHT- my stupid sick mouth can't taste anything, except for possibly maybe the Lusty Monk mustard that D and I just brought back from NC. The mustard that I have been waiting for an excuse to eat, plus it would probably clear out my nose , win win! But the damn Lusty Monk is brand new and stupid sick arms can't open the stupid bottle. Damn you body. Damn you monks and your lusty goodness
taunting me.

LATER LATER THAT NIGHT- I just beat the stupid jar with a knife like my mom showed me to do. Wack wack wack, put a towel over the lid, twist twist twist, grunt grunt grunt. No go. Ahhh. Set the jar down, then grab it up as to suprise it "Ah ha lid take this," wack wack wack, twist twist twist, grunt grunt grunt. Nothing. Walk away sniffiling while giving jar dirty look.


LATER LATER LATER THAT NIGHT- thought the scare tactic would work again. Nope.



LATER LATER LATER LATER THAT NIGHT- D came home and opened the jar.

D- Watch this honey- wack it on the counter.

Me- No no no I did the wack with a knife trick- only my sick arms won't work.

D-Yes that will work, but this is easier- watch. Wack wack, twist. Jar open.

Me-Pfffttt- I'm sick! (dirty look-walk away smiling)

Tomato

Pasta Time

So peeps guess what? Yours truly can make fresh pasta... with a little help from D of course! I show you exhibit A

The Wheeze!!

Snow told me the other day that I hadn't posted in ...oh... Months! Well, I did get that pug puppy; I named her Wheezy and she is the greatest. People frequently threaten to steal her. She is a very affectionate lovable girl and she does lots of funny things like spend 15 minutes barking at herself in the mirror. Here are a few pictures of her.

The World

When there are so many places in the world to see, why do I try so hard to stay in just one place- only to complain that I want to see the world?

Just like me

It's just like me to already be off track. Of course I have plenty of excuses. One of them being that I fell and busted my ass yesterday while helping D move my cedar chest into his truck.

So after I did my running around errands all I wanted to do was rest my sore muscles. Which is exactly what I did with my Mommy. We watched Julie and Julia a very charming movie and ate soup. It was nice. Then D came home and gave me a muscle relaxer and I was asleep by 83o.

Anyway, here are two little ones.

We(D and I) are like a Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.

I am a spider monkey with Tourette's .

Brillant Idea

Scrap of Paper Mondays- I have lots of ideas for stories I want to write or blog about or some just dreams. I write most of them as I go through the day on whatever surface is available; little scraps of paper. Every Monday I am going to gather the scraps of paper and blog about it. Hopefully it will provide us both with a much needed laugh. (Though remember my track record for procrastination so maybe don't get too set on the whole Monday thing.)

Interrupted

I interrupt this blog post that was going to contain - haunted hotel stories, me learning something about myself, Santa Bar Crawl and more to report on our dog.

Chance our lovable rescue brendal pitt-boxer mix just tripped me as I was walking across the living room with my laptop. (I am having a hard time constructing sentences right now. I keep wondering if they are run-ons.(is run-ons even a word? See what I mean.) Damn trying to learn grammar- always getting in my way. I'll be happy when it becomes second nature; like the way you arrive home from work not really remembering how you got there.) I had the open laptop balanced in my arms it was playing Jack Johnson Rodeo Clowns. I took two steps towards the couch trying to lift the cords from the back and keep them from tripping me. Apparently my computers cords and I had come in between Chance and his beloved green ball. The cord began to hit him in the head and stopped me short as I was walking. Though he could have easily taken a step back and solve the problem he refused to move as I proceeded to trip and try to balance the computer. It was then that I realized he was all tangled up and getting whacked in the head. "Chance buddy move!" I said loudly, not quite a yell but a firm command. Still he stood there looking at his ball but squinting his eyes as the cord continued to whack him. Finally I caught my balance and was able to pull the cords up and over his head allowing me to take the remaining two steps to the couch. Crazy damn (that is a loving damn) dog. He still didn't move, finally after a minute he grabbed his ball and brought it to me dripping with dog drool.

"I am not throwing that thing." I say to him. He then pulled out the doggie charm. He pouted and looked as sad as one of those dogs in the Sarah Maclaughin videos where they are dogs are abused and abandoned. Head down, puppy eyes up, ears flat back. I'm telling you, if they gave Oscars to dogs he would have just won. "Pathetic!" I said to him. I swear he smiled at me; smiled. Crazy crafty dog. I love him.

Now I am going to snuggle on the couch with my boys and watch a movie. It's relax and cook Sunday-my favorite day.

And, yes I did indeed throw the ball.

i did it

My blackberry is on fire and I need glasses now but I freakin did it... Go me! Goodnight blogland I must sleep.

Ashtray

Tomorrow supposedly I could spend all night at a bar in Norfolk and not smell like one. I will have to see for myself- I'm hopetical!

divorced

It was my fault too. At the end I knew how to push his buttons. I would be passive aggressive and watch him explode hoping this time it would be bad enough so I could leave.

books

Could blogs be modern days books? Are less books being written because people can be "published" online?

grown up

I don't think I will feel like a grown up until I know what's for dinner. I work, I own a house a car, I pay taxes, I vote, I should feel grown up. Nope. I think it comes down to my Mom always knowing what was for dinner. Like it's some great grown up mystery. She never asked anyone else. Never the "I don't know what do you want?" game. She just knew... Because she was grown up was my guess. It was probably because she had no one to ask she was it-the end of the line. Maybe it was because she was a mom. Since I don't see myself as a mom or alone I guess I'll never grow up.

Birth control

Can they hurry up with the male form already? Seriously, if they can make a pill to keep it hard surely they can make one to have it shoot blanks.

Sick

The good thing about being sick is it will help me lose those Thanksgiving pounds.

String cheese

I'm pretty positive it tastes beTter if you rip it apart instead of just eating it whole.